How many things do we start and never finish is it part of the patteren?

OK so much so much and yet so little time right? I lost my walking buddy although for a good reason and so now I need a new one. It is getting warmer so now there are no excuses to just get up and get out there and do it other then I just really need motivation. I need that cheering section to get me going. Easter this year wow, so we are getting balloons, and the kids and I are writing letters to Rocsheda, if any one else would like to do the same thing and give them to me I would love to put them in the balloons. We are going to let them off on Sunday after church. My mom and sister will be here so I hope that helps me get through the day a lot easier then I did last year. I can say at least I am not in the hospital having a melt down like I did last year. I also have the play to look forward too. I will have some great friends there to see us on our last performance. I am so glad that I have been able to be a part of bring Christ into some one life. Even if it was just one person. I feel good too, I was asked to make some one a birthday cake nothing fancy cause my decorating skills are to be desired and well I really need to take Marla's cake class I just have to get the money together to do it. One day it is on my list of things to do before I kick the bucket, decorate one really good cake. We go back to court on the 23 too. I am really praying that this will be the last time and Alex will get his papers and he can get a real job and we can get on our feet. I hate living like this I am tired of it, I know if I am tired of it I can not even imagine what he feels like. Time to spring clean too and I know it needs it in here I just have no will power to get it done. There is so much I want to get organized and just have no clue where to start at. I start a 100 different things and then nothing gets done at all. So here I am I am taking a step and saying hey I need help here. I need to clean stuff out, of the house, I think if I get stuff cleaned out of here it will help clear my mind and help me clear some junk out of my mind. I am going to call tomorrow and see what I can do about getting in some where so I can get back on my med's. I hate being on all of them but you know what it sure beets how I feel now. My mind is like a barreling train coming down a track with no where to stop it sucks feeling like this. I guess I would rather be loaded and think straight then barreling and not thinking straight. I also meet some one that works for the Dr. I have been looking at to do my Lap band. She is going to sit down with me hopefully some time next week so we can talk about some stuff so I can get started on getting it done. I know it will just be a tool for me, to go with the steps I am taking to over come this addiction. I hope every one has a great Easter and has many blessings with it.